Non-sailing report 21 – 23 January 2011  , Haslar Marina, Gosport

Crew – Don Hirst  , Becky Goddard  and Bob Buchannan  , Phil Steele 

Phil Steele booked a yacht with Phoenix Yacht Club to be informed that it could be their new acquisition “Quartette” a Westerly Oceanquest. As it happens Quartette was not yet ready for her maiden sail with Phoenix so   Firebird  , an Elan 340 would still be available.

We arrived about 21:30 at Haslar marina after stopping off for a pleasant meal in the Swan at Stoford. The kit and food were loaded on to two trolleys, although Don did express continued concern about he eggs. Don and Phil stopped in the facilities on the way to the boat whilst Becky and Bob went ahead.

Don went ahead while Phil proceeded along the frosty but salted pontoons towards the boat when Becky called to make haste as Bob had fallen in the marina. After a hurried arrival, the scene was Bob and Don wrestling to get one of he trolleys out of the oggy. Phil assisted this activity and noticed all the kit draining off on the pontoon. Becky then complained that Phil’s sleeping bag was very heavy to get out when sodden with water. Phil looked at Becky and noticed that Becky’s hair was wet and the kit was not the only thing draining down on the pontoon. This provoked the first question which was; who was it that fell in Becky or Bob?

The response was both; apparently Bob stepped in the water so Becky wanting to stay the centre of attention pushed the trolley in and jumped in herself and swam under the pontoon to emerge the other side. Bob was not in to synchronized swimming so he hopped out like a good dinghy sailor. He then proceeded to help Becky out. Don then arrived on the scene to help retrieve the kit from the water.

Bob said he mistook the edge of the finger causing him to step off, Becky was asked how she had managed to fall in as well, rather than explain she demonstrated by falling in again. Phil looked on in amazement and should have been a little more sympathetic, he said “I can’t believe you did that again and stop showing off. Becky, in an un-lady like manner suggested that we help her out of the cold water. Bob countered this and said that the water temperature was warmer than the air temperature. Once Becky was rolled out onto the pontoon Phil suggested she remain lying down safely and drain off while he put the boat’s deck light on and heater.

Becky was the only person with dry kit so Becky changed into dry clothing and lent Bob her best knickers and pyjamas in which he seemed alarmingly comfortable. Bob’s sleeping bag was also wet. A lot of electronic equipment proved not to like submerging in salt water although Don’s phone still worked and was able to report in. There was great consternation over the loss of the ketchup and concern for the pack of 15 eggs. The eggs were ok but alas the ketchup was lost.

After efforts in the marina’s launderette we were unable to dry the kit sufficiently to carry on with the weekend, so at 02:00 Saturday morning we resolved over a hot drink to abandon the trip and after a sleep and brunch we departed Haslar.

Phil was required to complete an insipid accident form for the marina and has since sent a detailed report to the Marina Manager who has promised to pass it on to the Directors of Dean and Readyhoff Ltd. (Secretary’s note: Phil has a good point. Several years ago I fell in here myself; in pitch dark and pouring rain, with oilies hood up. In these conditions it is very difficult to see where the width of the finger pontoons diminishes significantly, and only too easy to put a foot over the edge.)

To fall in once is unfortunate but despite consulting the thesaurus a descriptive word for falling in twice eludes, suggestions on a postcard to Jock (whose wife, who proof-reads these newsletters, says this was the most exciting trip report she has read for some time – let us hope she doesn’t have the same excitement again.)